Finding positive thoughts for 11 of the NHL’s non-playoff teams

It’s April, meaning there are three types of teams. The good ones have already locked up their playoff spot, and are playing out the string with an eye on seeding and home ice, waiting to find out who they’ll face in the first round. Other teams are still fighting for their invitation, with every game down the stretch feeling like a make-or-break contest where every moment matters.

And then, there are the loser teams.

Sorry, maybe there’s a kinder way to put that, but you know who I mean. These teams have no shot at the playoffs, even with weeks left on the schedule. They’re out, and in most cases they’ve been out for a long time. It’s a miserable time to be a fan of one of those teams – the lottery is still a month away, the draft is even further, you’re not sure if you’re even supposed to want your team to win anymore, and everyone else seems to be having way more fun than you are.

It’s rough. And I’m here to help. So today, let’s try our annual-ish exercise of coming up with some positivity for the truly hopeless teams. Using the playoff odds from Dom’s model and Moneypuck, we can find 11 teams that both models agree have less than a one percent chance at the postseason right now. That’s about as low as we can go, and it means we get to pretend that teams like the Penguins, Blues and (just barely) the Wild are still alive. You have to be pretty bad to be completely out of it with weeks left to play. And these teams are indeed quite bad.

Just not so bad that we can’t pump their tires a little bit. Let’s get positive, as we work through all 11 teams in order, from my picks for the easiest to feel good about down to the most challenging.

11. New Jersey Devils

The negative: In a year where everyone was expecting another step forward and some were even picking them to win the Stanley Cup, the Devils had one of those seasons where everything went wrong. It cost Lindy Ruff his job, and Wednesday’s fight-filled loss to the Rangers officially moved them below our “no hope” cutoff.

Positive thought #1: The Devils are going to be easy. They’re stacked with good young players, from Jack Hughes up front to Luke Hughes and Simon Nemec on the blue line. There are plenty of playoff-bound teams that would love to swap talent with the Devils. They’ll be fine.

Positive thought #2: Injuries are part of hockey, but the Devils had them worse than most. Missing Dougie Hamilton for most of the season was devastating, and they were also without Jack Hughes, Nico Hischier and Timo Meier for long stretches. Give them league-average health and they’re at least in the race. As I said, the Devils are almost too easy for this exercise.

Positive thought #3: The big problem all year was the goaltending, and they addressed that at the deadline with… huh, OK, maybe this won’t be that easy. Still, even as they whiffed on Jacob Markstrom or Jusse Saros or Jacques Plante or whoever else the armchair GMs thought they should get,